Women’s lives are busier than ever these days and unfortunately, taking care of ourselves mentally often slips to the bottom of the to-do list. But, mental health and wellbeing deserve way more of our attention because a healthy happy mind makes tackling our everyday tasks so much easier.  

Previously in our , Celebrity Love Expert and I had the opportunity to discuss some challenges and tips for couples and singles in quarantine.     It was great to reconnect with Nicole recently for some insight on preserving our mental energy and space, especially women.

Here are some tips to clear mental clutter and negative thoughts for a more positive day.  

1. Stay in your own lane – there’s nothing that drags a woman’s worth and confidence down more than comparison.   Spending even five minutes on social media is enough to trigger a shame spiral where we think every other woman has it more toffee than us and we’re failing.   So, every time you notice your mind falling into the comparison trap, stop and remind yourself ” I am equally as amazing as that person “. It sounds simple but often just affirming our own value at that moment is enough to remind him that we are worthy too.

2. Say “good job ” to yourself way more often.   If you have kids you’ll remember saying “good job ” to them for seemingly little things like using a fork correctly or going to the bathroom. We know instinctively that the way to get little children to feel confident and worthy is to tell them they’re doing a good job often but we forget to do the same thing for ourselves as adults.   Start a habit now of saying  good job to yourself for the little things and you’ll soon start to notice you feel way more worthy.   Finished a workout? Take a moment to congratulate yourself on a job well done. Cooked a home-cooked meal instead of ordering take out? Tell yourself you did a great job cooking. Find as many reasons as you can to affirm yourself all day long.

3. Forgive the past.   Often, what stops us from feeling worthy and having a positive mindset in the present moment is a mental tendency to hold on to negativity from the past. We replay past failures, disappointments, or times when things didn’t go our way over and over again in our minds and then we feel stuck in this present moment and like we aren’t worthy of more.   They key out of this mental trap is to forgive your past so you can set yourself free in this moment to choose again.   Think of the negativity from the past and say out loud ” past, I forgive you and release you.   Thank you for the lessons. I have moved on now. You can stay there in the past.   I am free now at this moment to have what I truly want “.   The more you practice forgiving the past and letting it go, the more you’ll notice a positive mindset that full of faith, not fear.

4. Clear your mind out on a regular basis.   We all know that if we don’t clean our house regularly it will get messy quickly but we forget that our mind needs regular cleaning too. Make it a habit to daily or weekly sit with a journal and write down all the negative or anxious thoughts that are swirling in your head. The idea here is that if you get the thoughts out of your head and see them for what they are, mostly fear-based lies, they won’t continue to swirl around in your mind. Once you’ve done your mental cleaning, fill the space you’ve created with positive affirmations.